As golf pros flee a hectic industry, leukemia victim Paul Ramee was a case study in happiness

The “hundred-day war.” For many golf professionals, especially those in the north, the time between Memorial Day and Labor Day is cautiously labeled as such. This is a make-or-break time for a club in the heart of the season when play is at its highest capacity.

Depending on yearly weather patterns or general club usage, this period can easily eclipse the century mark. Club championships, member-guests, junior league matches and member instructional programs overflow the calendar and clubs demand long hours from key leaders of an often already understaffed golf operation.

It’s the time of year that tests one’s mettle in the profession, and there are many times during this stretch where the work/family life balance takes a hit. There are plenty of stories documented of high-caliber pros leaving various clubs all around the country for careers outside the business. The universal stress of consistent 10-, 12-, or even 14-hour days can take their toll. Divorces amongst this demographic, sadly, are not uncommon.

It is important to differentiate between two basic types of golf leaders that make up the majority of the workforce. There are good pros at clubs who perform their general duties without much fanfare. They accomplish the normal aspects of their job but don’t necessarily go above and beyond to stand out. The run-of-the-mill pro.

The other type is the undisputed golf professional. These are the energetic people who create excitement and are highly knowledgeable about all aspects of the game. They also exhibit an infectious positivity and serve as a beacon of light to their family, friends, club members, students and staff. Their aura places them on a pedestal amongst their peers.

Enter Paul Ramee.

A bona fide golf professional in every sense of the phrase. By all accounts, he was born to live and thrive in such a hectic and ever-changing vocation. Ramee was successful at balancing the scales between his profession and his home life, and at the same time was aware of the pitfalls that deterred some of his contemporaries in the business.

His working world revolved around Bull’s Bridge Golf Club in South Kent, Connecticut, but he and his family would prioritize time to spend together on the course either before, during or after the height of the day. Time to recharge with his wife Tracey and three sons Hunter (23), Owen (19) and Oliver (16) was crucial to Ramee’s survival in the business. He was fortunate to lead a remarkable club with a thoughtful membership that supported this important yet often overlooked need.

Supporting the pro and the family in this way is not something all clubs entertain, and in fact, some club leaders foolishly deter it. Bull’s Bridge is a special, welcoming club and Ramee recognized and deeply cherished that fact without taking it for granted. Ramee began integrating his growing family into the operation when they were teenagers and inserted them into the caddie force and the outside operation staff.

Although she didn’t have an official role at the club, Tracey was involved and always had Paul’s ear about the latest apparel line for the golf shop and the like. Within the safety of this domain, he managed to balance the long summer days of club management with the peace and serenity of precious time with family during the twilight hours of the day.

After all, golf ran deep in the family’s DNA. Paul met his bride Tracey Ramee (formerly Bratz) when she took a lesson from him back in July 1993. Tracey’s mother Marilyn came home from a day at Canoe Brook where the Bratz family belonged and mentioned there was a “cute new guy” working in the golf shop. Tracey was working in nearby Hoboken but soon found herself driving west on I-78 more often during that summer for lessons.

Given Paul’s good looks, it was understandable if she wasn’t totally focused on Ramee’s teachings.

“The first time Paul and I went out to play I remember I kept hitting it under every tree,” Tracey said, blushingly.

The good news was that Ramee didn’t hold those wayward shots against her, and they started dating. Their courtship lasted just over two years and when they were both 26 years old, the two married on September 29, 1995.

Fast forward to last December and Ramee had his 19th season in the rearview mirror. He was in the exciting planning stages for his upcoming milestone 20th year which included a brand-new clubhouse on the horizon. This was a first for the club, which only had as much as a golf cottage from which all the club operations took place. Ramee and the membership desired to finally have a proper clubhouse like most other clubs had, and the COVID-19 pandemic had helped the bottom line tremendously to accelerate discussions. The time was right.

There were meetings upon meetings with the board, along with Zoom calls with architects. Paul was involved with it all, and he loved it. On December 7, 2021, however, the Ramee family and the Bull’s Bridge family would have their lives turned upside down. Instead of balancing budgets or advising staff, Ramee would have to manage something completely different. It was a cruel, unexpected, and unwelcome foe. Cancer. Acute myeloid leukemia to be exact.

Ramee had a little more than two weeks until his 53rd birthday at the time of the diagnosis, but he was a fighter and was relatively young and strong. He also had an unwavering, go-getter attitude and would undoubtedly follow his doctor’s orders to beat this disease. His “hundred-day war” would simply have to start earlier than usual, that’s all. “Listen here, partner … ,” he would often say to his staff or friends when he had something important to explain.

From left, Hunter, Paul, Owen and Oliver Ramee on the course. (Contributed photo)

Lord knows he was going to give cancer a stern talking to as well. What made Ramee a unique PGA Professional is that he seemingly served in every key role at the low-key, golf-only club nestled in northwestern Connecticut’s scenic Litchfield County. Bull’s Bridge is situated on nearly 400 acres with gorgeous views north to the Berkshires and west to New York State. He was the soul of the club; the golf professional, the director of instruction, the general manager and the chief financial officer all rolled into one. The latter two of those skills he learned on the fly.

“If it wasn’t for Paul, there would be no Bull’s Bridge,” said longtime club president, Peter Rothschild. “I marveled at his ability to be a natural manager, outside of his golf professional abilities. It’s hard to find a person who knew how to develop a team and hold people to high standards. He was demanding and expected the best out his staff and he held himself to that same standard.”

Ramee’s stewardship of Bull’s Bridge began back in April 2003 after assistant professional stints at Canoe Brook Country Club under longtime pro Greg Lecker and at famed Oakmont under legendary professional Bob Ford. There was also a head professional job in Buffalo where he cut his teeth leading an operation for the first time.

At Bull’s Bridge, Ramee was carefully selected through a rigorous process from over 70 qualified candidates. He was hopeful that this new club would provide solid footing for him and his young family, but there were many unnerving aspects of the new gig that would have scared away a lesser golf professional.

He first survived an ownership change from the original developer to a member-owned club after there were several financial issues that forced the members’ hand to purchase the club outright. The club faced a substantial amount of debt and had some lean years, to say the least (Ramee would subsequently teach himself the ins and outs of restructuring debt).

Tracey and Paul Ramee. (Contributed photo)

There were early times when the club couldn’t pay his salary. He also couldn’t forget that Bull’s Bridge only had 16 holes completed at the time of his hiring with merely a double-wide trailer serving as home base. The club was on shaky ground. Despite all these uncertainties underfoot, he poured his heart and soul into the operation and was determined to see its long-term success. He had the foresight to understand that the opportunity to grow something from the ground up could have its advantages.

He loved everything about the game in addition to the business side of golf. He kept the faith that he could make a successful career at an isolated club with largely a non-resident membership who trekked the 80 or so miles north from New York City on weekends. Paul immediately took the bull by the horns (no pun intended) and oversaw the completion and maintenance of the course, the golf operation, the finances and the food and beverage operation. No small task, but he took it on with the utmost professionalism and established the framework for a culture that would stand the test of time.

“It was a really gutsy move on his part to take this job. Especially when we were new and didn’t know if this club was going to survive or not,” said Peter May, Director Emeritus of Bull’s Bridge.

In Ramee’s formative days in Chatham, New Jersey, he literally grew up on a golf course and the game guided his early years. His childhood home was on the 12th tee of Fairmount Country Club, and he would incessantly play the loop of the 12th through 15th holes after member play had passed.

Over time, Ramee’s game improved to the point that he became a proud member of the Seton Hall golf team. While in college, he also started to work in the bag room during the summer at Fairmount for golf professional Kevin Riley. Paul’s brothers Arthur and Pete both worked at Fairmount, too, which eventually led Ramee to shift his focus towards the business of the game and he would ultimately become an assistant there.

The way he played and presented himself as a golf professional grabbed the eye of many, including Greg Lecker. Lecker was the golf professional of nearby Canoe Brook Country Club in the posh, preppy zip code of nearby Summit, New Jersey.

“Paul had model-like looks and always dressed to the nines,” Greg admired.

“Paul wore cuffs before guys wore cuffs. He was a sharp young man.” Lecker continued, “I didn’t always hire people from New Jersey, but Paul stood out and was a great local guy that made a nice connection to our membership at Canoe Brook. He had a special energy about him. That’s what got me to hire him.”

Lecker was an assistant professional at Oakmont for Ford, and after a short time felt compelled to praise Ramee’s virtues to his former boss when Oakmont had an opening for an assistant pro. Ford quickly took notice that he had a gem of a person in his midst.

“Paul came to Oakmont and we had dinner down at a local eatery called Hoffstots. The minute I met him I knew was going to hire him,” Ford recalled. “He was one of those guys that when you meet him, you instantly like him. He lit up the room.”

To many, an apprenticeship at Oakmont is considered the “golden ticket” to acquiring a coveted head professional role, and Ramee soaked in every ounce of knowledge Ford could offer.

In the winter of 1997, Ramee used his growing skill set and pedigree to land his first head professional position at The Park Country Club in the Buffalo suburb of Williamsville, N.Y., an important step in his blossoming career. As Ramee’s career kept advancing, there were a few constants pillars by which he built the foundation of his life. Outside of his family, one of those pillars were the valued friendships he made along the way. He enjoyed being around people as much as anything in life. Sam Wiley was a professional contemporary with whom Ramee connected with in New Jersey. Their career paths ironically paralleled each other for over 25 years.

From left, Adam Brigham, Greg Lecker, Dave Padgett and Paul Ramee. (Contributed photo)

When Wiley left Canoe Brook to become an assistant at famed Oak Hill, Ramee took his place on the Canoe Brook staff after Wiley’s prodding to Lecker. When Wiley got the head pro job at The Country Club of Buffalo, Ramee followed with his own head pro job just two miles away at The Park Country Club after Wiley wrote a letter to the neighboring club on Ramee’s behalf.

Their wives regularly played golf together and were close-knit, too. You could say that the Wileys and Ramees were joined at the hip. Wiley and Ramee became an inseparable duo who would bounce ideas off one another at any time of year. Whether it was at the numerous PGA Shows in Orlando or while Paul was waging his battle with leukemia in the Yale’s New Haven Hospital.

“Even as Paul was fighting cancer, he was texting with me about bringing in new lines of clothing,” Wiley recounted.

When Wiley left to become the head professional at Wee Burn in Darien, Conn., it was almost inevitable that Ramee would follow him to that state as well. After all, Bull’s Bridge was only 51 miles north of Wee Burn. Wiley would play a part in that move as well a few years later.

Another longtime friend was Eddie Shannon. They met when Ramee worked at Fairmount where Shannon’s family belonged.

“Paul was the coolest cat,” Shannon gleamed. “He wore the most stylish FootJoy saddle shoes you’ve ever seen.”

Shannon admired Ramee’s style and his competitive game and would often caddie for him in local and regional events.

“We didn’t have a ton of success as a player and caddie, but that didn’t matter. What mattered is that we carried our friendship from that point all throughout life,” Shannon said.

As a token of his appreciation, Ramee gave Shannon a coveted white Seton Hall headcover. It displayed a stitched pirate mascot that Shannon carried on his bag over the next 30 years with great pride despite its deteriorating appearance.

The white Seton Hall Pirate headcover. (Contributed photo)

The Seton Hall University connection that Shannon and Ramee shared was also linked with Paul’s son, Hunter (who earned his degree from the university and was a valuable member of the golf team for four years). They would continue to text and communicate quite often during Ramee’s lengthy hospital stays, but despite his condition, he always inquired about Eddie and his family without lamenting about himself.

“It was never about Paul,” Shannon recounted.

“Paul was always thankful and grateful,” Lecker said, in agreement. “On Thanksgiving and Christmas Day would always thank both Bob (Ford) and I for getting him to where he was to that day. He always remembered where he was from.”

When Ramee earned the highly sought golf professional position at Bull’s Bridge, he knew he had to set the culture, especially considering the staff was small and the club was brand new. He would have to develop the right vibe when people would step on the property. How would members be greeted? What would the staff wear? How would the practice tee and golf course be presented? What clothing would be appropriate for the golf shop? These and other questions would have to be answered if the club were to become a success.

Ramee would bring his knowledge from his previous clubs to bear while maintaining the low-key, “anti-Hamptons” vibe that was inherent in rural northwestern Connecticut.

Over time, Ramee had developed a golf-centric culture with traditional rules, but devoid of stuffiness. No hats were allowed indoors as a sign of respect. The staff dressed impeccably, yet they were welcoming. The events were fun but professional. The instruction was on point and utilized the latest in technology. This wasn’t necessarily an easy accomplishment given the club consisted of more New York-based members who visited mostly on the weekends as opposed to a local membership where these bonds are developed more quickly throughout the entire week.

Ramee had the savvy to figure it all out and create lasting friendships, whether amongst the members or the staff. Ramee strengthened those bonds by heading off campus for trips revolving around the game.

Each fall, he had a tradition to invite assistants as well as longtime membership director Ted Kohler to celebrate the end of the season and get away from the club to play somewhere. He would also travel with the membership overseas; sometimes to Royal Dornoch in Scotland where Tracey once surprisingly gifted him a membership. He would kick back and enjoy a bottle of red wine with those he brought to Donald Ross’ majestic golfing playground. Sometimes more than a single bottle. He and a pro-member partner once drank Royal Dornoch dry of pinot noir.

One of Ramee’s greatest loves was to attend The Masters, and he would often travel south to Augusta with his former boss Lecker.

“We would always go to The Masters and run around there like a couple of 5th graders at the zoo,” Lecker chuckled. “We would buy matching hats so we could spot each other in the crowd if we got lost. We had a blast.

“During those Masters trips, we would sit up late and chat about everything. Paul had the gift for gab that lasted so late into the night that I had to plead for him to finally go to bed.”

Signs for Amen Corner at Augusta National Golf Club. (Photo: Rob Schumacher-USA TODAY Sports)

Aside from playing golf and appreciating its championships, one thing that really got Ramee’s golf juices flowing was teaching. While at Oakmont, his passion for instruction grew. By the time he got to Bull’s Bridge, he knew that if he taught the game well it would lead to member excitement which would reverberate throughout his membership. It would start a ripple effect throughout the club and hopefully build up the club’s status outside of the club’s gates, too. He would teach for hours on end.

“Paul was a great teacher.” Member Frank Sellman continued, “he was quick to adopt technology, Trackman, force plates, you name it. He was always trying to better himself and those around him. Paul worked with everyone from beginning juniors to the club champion.”

His mentorship would extend beyond the Bull’s Bridge grounds. During the cold winters, Ramee rented out a space in nearby Milford, Conn., and named it “Golf on the Green” where he built his winter instruction business from scratch. He couldn’t get enough when it came to instruction and managed to lure a few of those winter clients into becoming members at Bull’s Bridge.

He would also go out of his way to help both the Kent School and South Kent School’s team (which lies across the street from Bull’s Bridge) as well as his alma mater at Seton Hall when he had time. He was always giving back and sharing the game that he loved. His tireless efforts were noticed by his peers and organizations in the golf world.

During his time at Bull’s Bridge, Ramee received a plethora of awards including Horton Smith Award (for role model in education) in 2014, Patriot Golf Award in 2015 (support of military), Teacher of the Year in 2016, and was continually recognized as one of the top instructors in the state of Connecticut by Golf Digest, as well as being named a Golf Channel Academy Instructor, PGA Magazine Ambassador, Contributing Writer for Proponent Golf, PGA quarter-century member, and a Connecticut PGA board member from 2006-2014.

Ramee accomplished it all. He understood the game and its people so intimately. He laid the groundwork for years upon years and he prognosticated that the club would garner success from his diligence and that of his staff. He was right.

Over time he watched the membership expand from these efforts and the profitability of the club grow. If luck is the residue of hard work, then Ramee was as lucky as one could become when those tough years started to quickly pay off in the unlikeliest of ways in Match of 2020.

The COVID-19 pandemic ravaged the world and golf suddenly became a perfect sport where people could socially distance themselves. The club — in a remote part of Connecticut and well removed from the hustle and bustle of New York City — quickly became the perfect locale. Golf boomed and the club was finally able to reap the harvest from the barrel of seeds that Ramee had sewn over time.

In 2020, the club’s profit exceeded $1 million for the first time in its history. Quite the accomplishment after such meager beginnings.

After his sudden diagnosis last December, there were numerous ups and downs in Ramee’s health and his spirits. He began chemotherapy immediately. He was in the hospital at Yale for 41 days the first go-round, with the last 18 of those days spent in isolation without visitors due to COVID rules.

He was only able to see Tracey on Christmas due to the visitation rules at the time the Omicron variant was spreading. He even spent his 53rd birthday (on December 29) in the hospital. The holidays were tough to not be able to partake in family gatherings. His hopes were raised when he was discharged from the hospital on January 16 and nine days later he received word that the chemo treatments worked and he was in complete remission. A shot in the arm for sure. A stem cell transplant was also being planned for the near future and the hunt for a donor was on. Signs were looking optimistic.

Suddenly, a turn in the wrong direction occurred less than two months later in mid-March due to an infection that weakened his heart and “really beat me up,” Ramee would say through a blog post that documented his plight.

“The eight days in the hospital dealing with the infection and it’s side effects were worse than dealing with leukemia,” he would write in his final post.

Ramee kept fighting as hard as he could to the end, and through it all, he kept one eye on the Bull’s Bridge operation from the hospital bed. Despite his physical absence, he would be involved from afar as much as his body would allow.

Astonishingly enough, only six days before his passing, he was on a Zoom call with architects to discuss the design of the new clubhouse. Ramee desperately wanted to see it through to completion and continued to share key thoughts about the design. He gave it his all to the very end.

This teaching area that built after Ramee’s death. (Contributed photo)

But on June 12, 2022, with family by his side, Paul Ramee sadly lost his battle with AML. His “hundred-day war” this time actually lasted 187 days. It was just over six months from his diagnosis until his passing. Barely more than 26 weeks.

Ironically, that’s the same number in full years he and his beloved Tracey had been so happily married. Everyone Ramee encountered throughout his life adored him, and when the Ramee family held a visitation for family and friends, over 500 people from near and far came to be with them. Tracey, Hunter, Owen and Oliver remained as strong as possible and stayed at the funeral home for over five hours greeting each person who came to say farewell and provide comfort.

“Paul was the center of gravity of the club and he will be terribly missed,” said Sellman. “One person will never fill his role.”

“This thing was Paul’s baby,” Kohler added. “He was so responsible for everything that has happened to this point. He was always the steady ship pushing through rough waters.”

“His devotion to the club was a complete reflection of the way you, the membership, treated him,” Tracey noted as she addressed the club’s membership and staff at a final club tribute ceremony to Paul on July 9. She continued, “From the moment we arrived here in 2003, you (the members) have all gone above and beyond in making him and our family feel at home. He loved working for and with you all.”

With life coming full circle, Ramee’s Seton Hall headcover that had been gifted to Eddie Shannon in 1993 recently came back to the Ramee family. It was a symbol of Ramee and Eddie’s friendship that Shannon thought Hunter should have. Just a few weeks ago that headcover was given back to Hunter at a lunch meeting between the two, and Hunter said he intends to frame it.

Shannon’s admiration for Ramee will never be far away from his daily thoughts.

“His authenticity and professionalism in the business was second to none,” Shannon recollected. “He was unbelievably engaging and well respected. As a person, he was authentic. It was never forced. That’s what I will always remember about him.”

They say you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. However, if you were lucky enough to know Paul Ramee, you knew exactly what you had. A devoted husband. A father who wanted everything for his children. A golf professional who always made your day brighter. A general manager who was a passionate leader. A seasoned instructor who was always there with a fix and a smile. A brilliant mentor. A true friend. He made everyone around him the best version of themselves. And he did so with the weight of a once fledgling club on his shoulders which he built into what will become his lasting legacy.

“Paul became the spirit of Bull’s Bridge when he arrived, and he will continue to be the spirit of Bull’s Bridge forever,” Rothschild said.

If you would like to make a donation in Paul’s memory, please donate to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. https://www.lls.org

Steve Scott is Golfweek’s Director of Instruction and been an on-course commentator with PGA Tour Live, FOX Sports and Golf Channel.